Life Party of One

You would think that all of the post-apocalyptic movies, books and video games would have prepared me for this scenario but sadly they have not. Even though I’ve imagined and even appreciated scenes like this in my mind’s eye, the reality of the situation is unexpected.


I’m all alone. I’ve always been a loner. I’ve always been lonely. This is different. This is the new truth that has exposed the lie of before. I look around and can’t help but wonder how the hell I’m going to go forward all alone.


Everyone is gone. Not dead. Just not here anymore.


“It’s what you always wanted” The voice has come from no where and every where all at once. It’s loud and clear and it’s inside my head. I choose not to listen. I’m good at that.


Standing in the middle of the street in this deserted city I imagine the once crowded sidewalks that I used to walk down with headphones on ignoring all that pass. The people would go to and fro, where ever their daily duties would bring them. They wouldn’t see me, it was as if I was invisible. The tables have turned and they are the one’s that are invisible now. Is that what happened? Is this all in my head?


It’s strange that all the animals and insects are gone as well. I never had a problem with them. Maybe this is real? Without any life the street is very quiet. I wonder if I listened hard enough if I could hear the waves crashing into the shore 100 miles away.


I’m not sure how long I’ve been standing here in the middle of the road with no chance of being hit by a car, beeped at or screamed at. I’ve been standing in this very spot for so long that my legs are weary from not moving. I have lost the motivation to move.


“Life party of one? Life party of one…” That damn voice again. Pulling me from my memories of the past.


I could go and explore the buildings, the stores, the apartments. But why bother? There is no one to share my finds with, no reward and no gain. I can have anything I want for free and yet I want nothing. There’s nothing I want or need and really no reason to be.


Time spins on or maybe it has stopped. It is hard to tell when there is no forward motion, no motion of any kind. Night and day are just words with no meaning. Say any word enough times and it will start to lose it’s place in the world. Is that what happened? My mind is playing tricks on me.


With nothing to catch my attention I fall into a deep sleep while standing in the road, not bothering to lay down. I feel peaceful and free. I am safe with no one to see me. Hours pass or maybe not for I’ve slept a dreamless sleep and I’ve awoken to the same scene.




Copyright 3/2/2016 – Life Party of One by Kerry Milauskas